Day 355 - When is it OK to cry

I have read (in one of my oh so wonderful parenting books) that one of the worst things you can tell a boy is "stop crying" or "don't cry".  Well personally I can think of a bunch of things that I think would be quite a bit worse to tell a boy, but I understand what they are saying.  We want our boys to be able to cry to express feelings (happy and sad) and to not feel ashamed about having those feelings.   However, we don't want crying to be a manipulative way that a 5 year old gets what he wants because you will do anything to stop that high pitched, nails against a chalkboard sound coming from the back seat of the car as you are sitting in Memorial Day interstate traffic.  So, today Doug tried to get Lukas to stop crying/screaming about something that would have been much better dealt with if he used actual words rather than his screaming/crying/monkey dying sounds at the top of his lungs.  As part of this event, Doug asked the boys, "When is it OK to cry?"  Samson quickly answered from the back seat, "When someone dies."  Then they both started laughing hysterically. So, have the boys heard us talk about the crying thing so much they are messing with us and get it or we are raising little emotionally demented kids?